{"id":10089,"date":"2022-06-13T12:42:28","date_gmt":"2022-06-13T12:42:28","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/?p=10089"},"modified":"2023-02-23T09:26:18","modified_gmt":"2023-02-23T09:26:18","slug":"9-tips-for-nonbinary-folks-navigating-bdsm-community-by-sinclair-sexsmith","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/9-tips-for-nonbinary-folks-navigating-bdsm-community-by-sinclair-sexsmith\/","title":{"rendered":"9 Tips for Nonbinary Folks Navigating BDSM Community"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t<div data-elementor-type=\"wp-post\" data-elementor-id=\"10089\" class=\"elementor elementor-10089\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-d4204c7 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"d4204c7\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-78d983a elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"78d983a\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t<style>\/*! elementor - v3.6.5 - 27-04-2022 *\/\n.elementor-heading-title{padding:0;margin:0;line-height:1}.elementor-widget-heading .elementor-heading-title[class*=elementor-size-]>a{color:inherit;font-size:inherit;line-height:inherit}.elementor-widget-heading .elementor-heading-title.elementor-size-small{font-size:15px}.elementor-widget-heading .elementor-heading-title.elementor-size-medium{font-size:19px}.elementor-widget-heading .elementor-heading-title.elementor-size-large{font-size:29px}.elementor-widget-heading .elementor-heading-title.elementor-size-xl{font-size:39px}.elementor-widget-heading .elementor-heading-title.elementor-size-xxl{font-size:59px}<\/style><h1 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">9 Tips for Nonbinary Folks Navigating BDSM Community<\/h1>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-fa180e2 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"fa180e2\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t<h2 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">By Sinclair Sexsmith<\/h2>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-283cc8d e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"283cc8d\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-0c970e4 elementor-widget elementor-widget-image\" data-id=\"0c970e4\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"image.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t<style>\/*! elementor - v3.6.5 - 27-04-2022 *\/\n.elementor-widget-image{text-align:center}.elementor-widget-image a{display:inline-block}.elementor-widget-image a img[src$=\".svg\"]{width:48px}.elementor-widget-image img{vertical-align:middle;display:inline-block}<\/style>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"2560\" height=\"1000\" src=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/9-tips-collage-art-scaled.jpg\" class=\"attachment-full size-full\" alt=\"9 tips collage art\" srcset=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/9-tips-collage-art-scaled.jpg 2560w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/9-tips-collage-art-300x117.jpg 300w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/9-tips-collage-art-1024x400.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/9-tips-collage-art-768x300.jpg 768w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/9-tips-collage-art-1536x600.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/9-tips-collage-art-2048x800.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 2560px) 100vw, 2560px\" \/>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-bb09e89 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"bb09e89\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-27f5d0c elementor-widget elementor-widget-image\" data-id=\"27f5d0c\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"image.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/www.clips4sale.com\/\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"250\" height=\"430\" src=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/08\/VM-NEW-YES.gif\" class=\"attachment-large size-large\" alt=\"\" \/>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-f2156c5 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"f2156c5\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-06d73f1 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"06d73f1\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t<style>\/*! elementor - v3.6.5 - 27-04-2022 *\/\n.elementor-widget-text-editor.elementor-drop-cap-view-stacked .elementor-drop-cap{background-color:#818a91;color:#fff}.elementor-widget-text-editor.elementor-drop-cap-view-framed .elementor-drop-cap{color:#818a91;border:3px solid;background-color:transparent}.elementor-widget-text-editor:not(.elementor-drop-cap-view-default) .elementor-drop-cap{margin-top:8px}.elementor-widget-text-editor:not(.elementor-drop-cap-view-default) .elementor-drop-cap-letter{width:1em;height:1em}.elementor-widget-text-editor .elementor-drop-cap{float:left;text-align:center;line-height:1;font-size:50px}.elementor-widget-text-editor .elementor-drop-cap-letter{display:inline-block}<\/style>\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So you\u2019re a nonbinary person \u2014 and you\u2019re kinky! Fantastic. The kinky world of pleasure, sensation, trust, intimacy, and intensity is open to you. Often, there are a lot of expectations for what kind of kink men are into, and what kind of kink women are into (these are stereotypes, and often incorrect). In my experience, nonbinary people have an easier time deconstructing the expectations of the binary gender roles and diving in to really discover what it is they particularly like. You don\u2019t have to subscribe to any of the gender role expectations of what kind of kink men and women \u201cshould\u201d enjoy \u2014 and this gives you a leg up.\u00a0<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You get to make your own treasure map. You get to make your own path.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What\u2019s that? Oh, you\u2019re tired of making your own path in all the aspects of your life? I certainly understand that. As a nonbinary trans masc person myself, who has been out as butch and out as kinky for more than twenty years, I have had to forge my way through multiple communities \u2014 including queer, kink, and writing communities. I\u2019ve carved so many paths for myself that my machete is dull and I have some wicked tennis elbow from having to create a trail through the high, thick brush where no trail was previously.\u00a0<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">It is hard to find acceptance and community as a nonbinary person navigating the kink communities. (Side note \u2014\u00a0I always say \u201cthe kink communities\u201d instead of \u201cthe kink community\u201d because there are many, many kink communities, and there is not only one. There are even different communities in the same city!) Especially from the outside, kink communities look as though they are dominated by heterosexual and cisgender folks. If you are lucky enough to have kink events in your town through a local club, leather bar, or education-focused kink organization, unless it is explicitly queer and explicitly for people of color, it is probably going to default to hetero, cis, white folks.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Don\u2019t worry, though. There are lots of resources out there for nonbinary, queer, and BIPOC folks in kink. (I\u2019ll get to that in a minute.)<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">And don\u2019t forget, the kink and BDSM communities were founded on queer sex and desire and by gay men and dykes, radical misfits, trans folks, people of color, and people who wanted to explore the limits and pleasures of the body. As kink has become more and more mainstream, queer, trans, and nonbinary people within the kink community might seem less common, but we aren\u2019t \u2014 we have always been here, and we will always be here. In fact, we are the ones who have been holding the pillars of the kink communities all along.\u00a0<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So even though the kink communities you\u2019ve tapped into might be predominantly hetero, white, cis, and affluent, there are many, many pockets of kink that center queers, people of color, nonbinary and trans folks, and DIY crafters.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Personally, my kink life has always been centered in queerness and gender radicalism. I came into kink in the late 1990s, and it was a very different world then, with the internet only just beginning and kink still deeply stigmatized. (It still is, of course, in many ways, but there is a lot more mainstream acceptance for it now.) The first kink events I ever went to were explicitly queer and kinky, and the first mentors and friends I had in kink were queer femmes, trans guys, butches, and gay men.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">So while I didn\u2019t have to navigate my way through a crowded hetero-dominated kink event at the beginning, I certainly have had to make my way through it as general kink events have become full of more and more heterosexual people.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Figuring out that you are kinky (or nonbinary, or many other things that we often are denied as we\u2019re younger and discover as we forge our own options) often takes time and effort. You may have felt, like I did, that becoming part of the kink community was an incredible feeling of liberation \u2014 that the kink communities were a safe space to express all kinds of desires for behavior (sometimes labeled \u201cdeviant\u201d or \u201cperverted\u201d), and that you finally had friends, acquaintances, mentors, and classes you could attend to learn more about your desires.\u00a0<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The kink communities can really feel like a miraculous place that way! And, even though there is liberation and exaltation in claiming, unapologetically, a kink identity, the kink communities are still a microcosm of the larger culture. There is still rampant racism, sexism, transphobia, homophobia, classism, ableism, and all the other aspects of oppression and marginalization inside of the kink communities \u2014\u00a0just like there is in the overculture.\u00a0<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Even though the kink communities look as though they are very normative from the outside, there are many, many people doing incredible organizing for trans, nonbinary, queer folks, and people of color.\u00a0<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">You can still find wonderful acceptance and place within kink.<\/span><\/p><p><a href=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/2022\/06\/02\/how-the-pandemic-made-us-kinkier\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Finding in-person community is harder since the pandemic<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. There are many folks who are high risk and immunocompromised, and kink events have varying COVID protocol policies. Make sure you check the location, whether it\u2019s indoors or outdoors, and what the testing and masking requirements are before you go, to assure that you know the risks you\u2019re taking.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There are <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/2022\/05\/10\/bdsm-classes\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">kink events happening in person<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> \u2014 I\u2019ve seen a rise of them in the spring and summer 2022. Some conferences are back in person, and some play parties, munches, socials, and bar nights are either happening again or never stopped.\u00a0<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">But regardless of whether you find <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/2022\/05\/20\/a-battleground-between-kink-and-censorship\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">kink community online<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, connect with a few folks on your own, or connect with a local or national (or international!) community, you, as a nonbinary person, deserve a place in the kink community. You might have to work to find it, but it\u2019s there, and you might be surprised at how wonderful it is to have a group of kinky, queer, nonbinary folks who you know and trust to do beautiful and rough things to each other.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Here are some tips for nonbinary folks navigating BDSM community. To find your people within kink: <\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-62528e7 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"62528e7\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-c1a7872 elementor-headline--style-rotate e-transform elementor-widget elementor-widget-animated-headline\" data-id=\"c1a7872\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;headline_style&quot;:&quot;rotate&quot;,&quot;animation_type&quot;:&quot;slide&quot;,&quot;rotating_text&quot;:&quot;#kinkspiration: &quot;,&quot;rotate_iteration_delay&quot;:2000,&quot;_transform_scale_effect&quot;:{&quot;unit&quot;:&quot;px&quot;,&quot;size&quot;:1.1,&quot;sizes&quot;:[]},&quot;loop&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;_transform_scale_effect_tablet&quot;:{&quot;unit&quot;:&quot;px&quot;,&quot;size&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;sizes&quot;:[]},&quot;_transform_scale_effect_mobile&quot;:{&quot;unit&quot;:&quot;px&quot;,&quot;size&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;sizes&quot;:[]}}\" data-widget_type=\"animated-headline.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t<link rel=\"stylesheet\" href=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/plugins\/elementor-pro\/assets\/css\/widget-animated-headline.min.css\">\t\t<h3 class=\"elementor-headline elementor-headline-animation-type-slide\">\n\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-headline-dynamic-wrapper elementor-headline-text-wrapper\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-headline-dynamic-text elementor-headline-text-active\">\n\t\t\t\t#kinkspiration:&nbsp;\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t<\/h3>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-aafba35 e-container--row e-container\" data-id=\"aafba35\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-dc155e1 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"dc155e1\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-be3f2b1 elementor-widget elementor-widget-image\" data-id=\"be3f2b1\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"image.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/tips-nonbinary-bdsm-community\/\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"300\" height=\"78\" src=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/hand-300x78.png\" class=\"attachment-medium size-medium\" alt=\"\" srcset=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/hand-300x78.png 300w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/hand-768x200.png 768w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/hand.png 1000w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-e96db13 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"e96db13\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-0340e0c elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"0340e0c\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/non-binary-bdsm-names-dom-sub\/\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\">94<em> Genderless BDSM Titles &amp; Honorifics<\/em><\/span><\/a><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-3bff891 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"3bff891\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-7efe5eb elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"7efe5eb\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<h2><b>1.<\/b> <b>Get bold<\/b><\/h2>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-3fb9b15 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"3fb9b15\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-2839159 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"2839159\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Not everyone is the biggest extrovert\u2019s extrovert, so you might have to guzzle down some courage, read some blog posts on how to make friends, and put yourself out there. The process of creating a new community and friend circle absolutely is kind of like dating, or finding a job. Attending social events, figuring out how to say hi to people who look and sound interesting, figuring out how to give them your contact info (or getting theirs), and then actually following up are all big steps before you even start forming something deeper. It can feel daunting and hard, but the kink community is actually incredibly welcoming to new folks, and most clubs and events host new member orientations or kink 101 classes frequently. It might help to have what a friend of mine calls a \u201cwhite belt\u201d frame of mind \u2014 if you\u2019re brand new at this, you may as well just own that! It\u2019s absolutely okay to be new. Inexperienced folks are coming into the kink communities all the time, so you won\u2019t be the only one.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-8a82269 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"8a82269\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-e73d715 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"e73d715\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<h2><b>2. Start by asking the queers!<\/b><\/h2>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-dba08fd e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"dba08fd\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-90433f3 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"90433f3\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Go to queer events, talk to other nonbinary people that you know, go to queer kink socials, and start asking around about the kink resources in your area. This is, absolutely, made harder by the COVID pandemic, because things may or may not be happening in person, and you may not want to meet in person. But, if you filter for queerness \u2014 and, relatedly, by nonbinary and trans community \u2014 first, you will get recommendations from other nonbinary, trans, and queer folks about what kink events in your area are the most nonbinary-friendly. That can help, rather than starting with general kink and trying to hunt for the sub-community of queers and gender outlaws.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-8cdbd29 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"8cdbd29\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-f175b25 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"f175b25\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<h2><b>3. Do find your local kink community<\/b><\/h2>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-4f7474b e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"4f7474b\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-2207d91 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"2207d91\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Your city might already have kink events happening \u2014 start looking around! Do some research and see what kind of leather clubs exist in your area, and whether they are doing any events online or in person. Spend some time on Google, Fetlife, and Facebook looking for BDSM groups, clubs, and events. Text the two or five kinky people you know and ask them where you should start. Get some recommendations. Don\u2019t be afraid to ask for help.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-8f592c3 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"8f592c3\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-76a03e9 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"76a03e9\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<h2><b>4. Find online events<\/b><\/h2>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-3e00615 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"3e00615\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-166e11c elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"166e11c\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Even if there\u2019s not much happening in your local kink community, there are a lot of online resources. <\/span><a href=\"http:\/\/bit.ly\/ss-ka\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Kink Academy<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> is an amazing place, full of dozens of educators who are sharing some of their best content. The price for a monthly membership is not any more than an average in-person event, so it is definitely worth it to try out a membership for a few months, watch as much as you can, and decide whether or not you want to keep it. Also check out <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/wickedgrounds.com\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Wicked Grounds<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, the kinky coffeehouse and education center out of San Francisco; <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/karada-house.de\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Karada House<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, a collective of kinky queer folks out of Berlin; and <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/theexiles.org\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The Exiles<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, who are one of the oldest women, trans, and nonbinary leather clubs in the country, and whose programming went online in 2020 and they now have members throughout the US and Canada.<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-c1c3ccd e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"c1c3ccd\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-d7d4ad5 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"d7d4ad5\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<h2><b>5. Attend some national or international events<\/b><\/h2>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-9cb06e8 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"9cb06e8\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-5c8c22d elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"5c8c22d\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Many conferences moved online during the COVID pandemic, and some new all-<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/2022\/05\/10\/bdsm-classes\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">virtual BDSM conferences<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> have showed up, too. Check out <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.imslbb.org\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">IMsLBB<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/thrivevirtualcon.com\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Thrive<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, and <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.sexdownsouth.com\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sex Down South<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, all of which include many queer, trans, and nonbinary people. When you attend classes, make note of the presenters that you like and follow their work. They might be teaching other places that you\u2019ve never heard of, so find out where else to attend. Make note, too, of the people who are attending who make smart comments in the chat or during a question and answer period, and tell them that you appreciated what they shared. Ask if you can connect on Fetlife (or Facebook, or Instagram, or wherever else you tend to hang out).<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-41cbe20 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"41cbe20\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1ea9db9 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"1ea9db9\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<h2><b>6. Seek out kink community on social media<\/b><\/h2>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-75c741c e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"75c741c\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-834eb10 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"834eb10\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Fetlife is the obvious social media site to connect with kinky folks, but many people find it hard to navigate or overwhelming, or they often can receive unsolicited messages and feel a bit unsafe. Do some research on the best ways to use Fetlife \u2014 for example, make some educated decisions about what photos to share of yourself. You might also want to not share your real age or location, depending. <\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Discord, Facebook, Twitter, Tiktok, and Instagram all have many ways to connect with kink community, too. Twitter has the most lax policies about sharing explicitly sexual content, but there are people sharing education, information about events, and general kink musings on all of them. See if some of the kink educators you like are on your favorite platforms and follow them there, and check out who else they recommend.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-94a0435 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"94a0435\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-0b2ade4 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"0b2ade4\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<h2><b>7. Make yourself a bingo card<\/b><\/h2>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-f1853ed e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"f1853ed\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-e251e25 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"e251e25\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you\u2019re the kind of person who likes to gamify your life, creating your own bingo card for reaching out to kink community could be a fun goal. Include things like: go to a social event, go to a play party, research my local kink groups, ask three people I know if they have any suggestions for kink events or community, give someone my Fetlife handle, attend an online conference. When you get a bingo, celebrate! <\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-a9c57e8 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"a9c57e8\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-cbcdfc3 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"cbcdfc3\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<h2><strong>8. If you really want to find kinky nonbinary folks, you might have to travel<\/strong><\/h2>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-9833644 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"9833644\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-694e858 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"694e858\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you really want to find some nonbinary folks in kink, and you don\u2019t live in a big city with a big enough kink community that there are queer and nonbinary specific or targeted events happening, you might have to travel. If you feel safe enough traveling, given the COVID risks, find a kink event that you want to attend in New York City, Chicago, or San Francisco, and make a trip of it. There are many things to visit in all of those places separate from whatever event you find, so you can easily make a weekend (or a week) of it. Check out <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/darkodyssey.com\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Dark Odyssey<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> (they throw four events a year, three on the east coast and one of the west coast), <\/span><a href=\"http:\/\/imslbb.org\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">International Ms Leather\/International Ms Bootblack Contest &amp; Conference<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> (which will happen near San Francisco in 2023), and <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/lesbiansexmafia.org\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">LSM<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> (a women, trans, and nonbinary focused BDSM group out of New York City).\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-bf801a2 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"bf801a2\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-8801572 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"8801572\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<h2><b>9. Create your own kink group!<\/b><\/h2>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-dd64624 e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"dd64624\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-94893bb elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"94893bb\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you\u2019re not getting anywhere finding a group to jump into, you might just want to create your own. Ask your kink friends if they want to have a monthly discussion group, book group, kinky movie night, or Kink Academy watch party. Ask them to bring their kinky friends, and pretty soon you\u2019ll have more than enough to get you connected and learning.<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Finding and creating kink community is not an easy task \u2014 and, even once you have it, staying active in it is an ongoing project. It takes work and effort to find the people who you really resonate with \u2014 but it is so worth it! Having people to validate your identity, explain things to you when you learn new things, share in your milestones or challenges, and maybe even play or flirt with is essential in the kink journey. You do not have to go at this alone! There are so many places to dive in and find connection. <\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1906b2c e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"1906b2c\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-646eee1 elementor-widget elementor-widget-image\" data-id=\"646eee1\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"image.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"244\" height=\"339\" src=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/non-binnary-1-1.jpg\" class=\"attachment-large size-large\" alt=\"\" srcset=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/non-binnary-1-1.jpg 244w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/non-binnary-1-1-216x300.jpg 216w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 244px) 100vw, 244px\" \/>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-8e6aced e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"8e6aced\" data-element_type=\"container\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-4819acc elementor-share-buttons--view-icon elementor-share-buttons--shape-circle elementor-share-buttons--align-center elementor-share-buttons--color-custom elementor-share-buttons--skin-gradient elementor-grid-0 elementor-widget elementor-widget-share-buttons\" data-id=\"4819acc\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"share-buttons.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t<link rel=\"stylesheet\" href=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/plugins\/elementor-pro\/assets\/css\/widget-share-buttons.min.css\">\t\t<div class=\"elementor-grid\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-grid-item\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-share-btn elementor-share-btn_reddit\" tabindex=\"0\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-share-btn__icon\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<svg class=\"e-font-icon-svg e-fab-reddit\"><use xlink:href=\"#fab-reddit\" \/><\/svg>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tclass=\"elementor-screen-only\">Share on reddit<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-grid-item\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-share-btn elementor-share-btn_twitter\" tabindex=\"0\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-share-btn__icon\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<svg class=\"e-font-icon-svg e-fab-twitter\"><use xlink:href=\"#fab-twitter\" \/><\/svg>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tclass=\"elementor-screen-only\">Share on twitter<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-grid-item\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-share-btn elementor-share-btn_facebook\" tabindex=\"0\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-share-btn__icon\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<svg class=\"e-font-icon-svg e-fab-facebook\"><use xlink:href=\"#fab-facebook\" \/><\/svg>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tclass=\"elementor-screen-only\">Share on facebook<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-grid-item\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-share-btn elementor-share-btn_linkedin\" tabindex=\"0\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span class=\"elementor-share-btn__icon\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<svg class=\"e-font-icon-svg e-fab-linkedin\"><use xlink:href=\"#fab-linkedin\" \/><\/svg>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<span\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tclass=\"elementor-screen-only\">Share on linkedin<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/span>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-726bcb7 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"726bcb7\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p>Sharing is caring\u00a0<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div><div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-6edcb1c e-container--column e-container\" data-id=\"6edcb1c\" data-element_type=\"container\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;slideshow&quot;,&quot;background_slideshow_gallery&quot;:[{&quot;id&quot;:1291,&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https:\\\/\\\/zippermagazine.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2022\\\/05\\\/Rectangle-16.png&quot;}],&quot;background_slideshow_loop&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;background_slideshow_slide_duration&quot;:5000,&quot;background_slideshow_slide_transition&quot;:&quot;fade&quot;,&quot;background_slideshow_transition_duration&quot;:500}\">\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-fdbe812 elementor-widget elementor-widget-image\" data-id=\"fdbe812\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"image.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"250\" height=\"300\" src=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/Screenshot-2022-06-14-at-15.36.22-250x300.png\" class=\"attachment-medium size-medium\" alt=\"\" srcset=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/Screenshot-2022-06-14-at-15.36.22-250x300.png 250w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/Screenshot-2022-06-14-at-15.36.22.png 621w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 250px) 100vw, 250px\" \/>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-0870cdb elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"0870cdb\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sinclair Sexsmith<\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-11c8910 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"11c8910\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p>photo by Bill Wadman<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-674b4cc elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"674b4cc\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sinclair Sexsmith (they\/them) is an award-winning queer trans masc writer focusing on queer culture, trauma, dominance, submission, spiritual kink, and transgender and nonbinary issues. Sinclair\u2019s creative nonfiction and queer erotica writings are widely published online and in more than thirty anthologies, including eight volumes of <\/span><a href=\"http:\/\/sugarbutch.net\/books\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Best Lesbian Erotica <\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">series. They are the editor of <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Best Lesbian Erotica of the Year Volume 4,<\/span><\/i> <i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Volume 5, Volume 6, Best Lesbian Erotica 2012, Erotix: Literary Journal of Somatics<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, and <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Say Please: Lesbian BDSM Erotica<\/span><\/i><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. Their short story collection, <\/span><a href=\"http:\/\/sugarbutch.net\/sweet-and-rough\/\"><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sweet &amp; Rough: Queer Kink Erotica<\/span><\/i><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, was a 2015 finalist for a Lambda Literary Award. Sinclair writes at <\/span><a href=\"http:\/\/sugarbutch.net\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">sugarbutch.net<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> since 2006, recognized numerous places as one of the top sex blogs. They have been teaching about erotic writing, the power of queer narratives, somatic arts, and many sex and kink techniques since 2002. Sinclair is an international leather titleholder, a pretty good cook, and an avid creative journaler. Follow all their work at <\/span><a href=\"http:\/\/patreon.com\/mrsexsmith\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">patreon.com\/mrsexsmith<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">.\u00a0<\/span><\/p><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Sinclair will be running <\/span><a href=\"http:\/\/dsplayground.com\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">D\/s Playground<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, their 8-week online course about power dynamics, starting in July 2022. <\/span><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-0ea338c elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"0ea338c\" data-element_type=\"section\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-5809e27\" data-id=\"5809e27\" data-element_type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-1092af3 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"1092af3\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t<p class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">READ NEXT<\/p>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-f73fd41 elementor-posts--align-center elementor-posts__hover-none elementor-grid-2 elementor-grid-tablet-2 elementor-grid-mobile-1 elementor-posts--thumbnail-top elementor-widget elementor-widget-posts\" data-id=\"f73fd41\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;cards_row_gap_mobile&quot;:{&quot;unit&quot;:&quot;px&quot;,&quot;size&quot;:20,&quot;sizes&quot;:[]},&quot;cards_columns&quot;:&quot;2&quot;,&quot;cards_row_gap&quot;:{&quot;unit&quot;:&quot;px&quot;,&quot;size&quot;:60,&quot;sizes&quot;:[]},&quot;cards_columns_tablet&quot;:&quot;2&quot;,&quot;cards_columns_mobile&quot;:&quot;1&quot;,&quot;cards_row_gap_tablet&quot;:{&quot;unit&quot;:&quot;px&quot;,&quot;size&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;sizes&quot;:[]}}\" data-widget_type=\"posts.cards\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t<link rel=\"stylesheet\" href=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/plugins\/elementor-pro\/assets\/css\/widget-posts.min.css\">\t\t<div class=\"elementor-posts-container elementor-posts elementor-posts--skin-cards elementor-grid\">\n\t\t\t\t<article class=\"elementor-post elementor-grid-item post-17715 post type-post status-publish format-standard has-post-thumbnail hentry category-bdsm-how-to category-consent__safety category-fetish_spotlight category-sunny_megatron\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-post__card\">\n\t\t\t\t<a class=\"elementor-post__thumbnail__link\" href=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/tradwife-vs-domestic-service-sub\/\" ><div class=\"elementor-post__thumbnail\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1400\" height=\"547\" src=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/Tradwife-v-DSS.jpg\" class=\"attachment-full size-full\" alt=\"\" srcset=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/Tradwife-v-DSS.jpg 1400w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/Tradwife-v-DSS-300x117.jpg 300w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/Tradwife-v-DSS-1024x400.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/12\/Tradwife-v-DSS-768x300.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1400px) 100vw, 1400px\" \/><\/div><\/a>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-post__text\">\n\t\t\t\t<h1 class=\"elementor-post__title\">\n\t\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/tradwife-vs-domestic-service-sub\/\" >\n\t\t\t\tWhat&#8217;s the Difference Between a Tradwife &#038; Domestic Service Submissive?\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t<\/h1>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-post__excerpt\">\n\t\t\t<p>Tradwives seem to fit right into the BDSM world. They\u2019re pretty much 24\/7 domestic service subs with a 1950s housewife twist, right? Not exactly. There\u2019s a few key differences between these submissive roles &#038; their subcultures that you need to know. <\/p>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/article>\n\t\t\t\t<article class=\"elementor-post elementor-grid-item post-21176 post type-post status-publish format-standard has-post-thumbnail hentry category-fetish_spotlight category-videos\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-post__card\">\n\t\t\t\t<a class=\"elementor-post__thumbnail__link\" href=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/exploring-feedism-with-ivy-davenport\/\" ><div class=\"elementor-post__thumbnail\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1400\" height=\"583\" src=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/Zipper-FEEDISM.png\" class=\"attachment-full size-full\" alt=\"\" srcset=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/Zipper-FEEDISM.png 1400w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/Zipper-FEEDISM-300x125.png 300w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/Zipper-FEEDISM-1024x426.png 1024w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/03\/Zipper-FEEDISM-768x320.png 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1400px) 100vw, 1400px\" \/><\/div><\/a>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-post__text\">\n\t\t\t\t<h1 class=\"elementor-post__title\">\n\t\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/exploring-feedism-with-ivy-davenport\/\" >\n\t\t\t\tExploring Feedism with Ivy Davenport\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t<\/h1>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-post__excerpt\">\n\t\t\t<p>Welcome to a deep dive into the world of fetism and fat fetish with Ivy Davenport, a seasoned expert in the adult industry, specializing in the nuanced world of weight gain and the appreciation of larger bodies. <\/p>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/article>\n\t\t\t\t<article class=\"elementor-post elementor-grid-item post-11716 post type-post status-publish format-standard has-post-thumbnail hentry category-kink_fundamentals category-kink_resources category-lgbtqia\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-post__card\">\n\t\t\t\t<a class=\"elementor-post__thumbnail__link\" href=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/non-binary-bdsm-names-dom-sub\/\" ><div class=\"elementor-post__thumbnail\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1400\" height=\"547\" src=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/94-names.jpg\" class=\"attachment-full size-full\" alt=\"\" srcset=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/94-names.jpg 1400w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/94-names-300x117.jpg 300w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/94-names-1024x400.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/94-names-768x300.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1400px) 100vw, 1400px\" \/><\/div><\/a>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-post__text\">\n\t\t\t\t<h1 class=\"elementor-post__title\">\n\t\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/non-binary-bdsm-names-dom-sub\/\" >\n\t\t\t\t94 Non-Binary BDSM Names for Doms &#038; Subs\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t<\/h1>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-post__excerpt\">\n\t\t\t<p>You\u2019re familiar with common kink titles\/names \u2013 Sir, Mistress, boy, Daddy, Mommy, good girl, Master, Domme, princess. What about gender-neutral options? This list of 94 non-binary BDSM honorifics has plenty to choose from or may inspire you to craft your own.<\/p>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/article>\n\t\t\t\t<article class=\"elementor-post elementor-grid-item post-10089 post type-post status-publish format-standard has-post-thumbnail hentry category-bdsm-how-to category-consent__safety category-culture_and_community category-lgbtqia\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-post__card\">\n\t\t\t\t<a class=\"elementor-post__thumbnail__link\" href=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/9-tips-for-nonbinary-folks-navigating-bdsm-community-by-sinclair-sexsmith\/\" ><div class=\"elementor-post__thumbnail\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"2560\" height=\"1000\" src=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/9-tips-collage-art-scaled.jpg\" class=\"attachment-full size-full\" alt=\"9 tips collage art\" srcset=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/9-tips-collage-art-scaled.jpg 2560w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/9-tips-collage-art-300x117.jpg 300w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/9-tips-collage-art-1024x400.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/9-tips-collage-art-768x300.jpg 768w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/9-tips-collage-art-1536x600.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/9-tips-collage-art-2048x800.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 2560px) 100vw, 2560px\" \/><\/div><\/a>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-post__text\">\n\t\t\t\t<h1 class=\"elementor-post__title\">\n\t\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/9-tips-for-nonbinary-folks-navigating-bdsm-community-by-sinclair-sexsmith\/\" >\n\t\t\t\t9 Tips for Nonbinary Folks Navigating BDSM Community\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t<\/h1>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-post__excerpt\">\n\t\t\t<p>It can be challenging to find community as a kinky nonbinary person. So much of the BDSM subculture, from D\/s archetypes to representation, is rooted in \u201ctraditional\u201d gender roles. How do you find your people and place within kink? These tips can help.<\/p>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/article>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\n\n\t\t\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>It can be challenging to find community as a kinky nonbinary person. So much of the BDSM subculture, from D\/s archetypes to representation, is rooted in \u201ctraditional\u201d gender roles. How do you find your people and place within kink? These tips can help.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":19184,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"elementor_header_footer","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[15,18,25,21],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v19.1 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>9 Tips for Nonbinary Folks Navigating BDSM Community - Zipper Magazine<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"It can be challenging to find community as a kinky nonbinary person. So much of the BDSM subculture, from D\/s archetypes to representation, is rooted in \u201ctraditional\u201d gender roles. How do you find your people and place within kink? These tips can help.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/9-tips-for-nonbinary-folks-navigating-bdsm-community-by-sinclair-sexsmith\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"9 tips for nonbinary folks navigating bdsm community by Sinclair Sexsmith\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"It can be challenging to find community as a k1nky nonbinary person. So much of the BDSM subculture, from D\/s archetypes to representation, is rooted in \u201ctraditional\u201d gender roles. How do you find your people and place within k1nk? These tips can help.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/9-tips-for-nonbinary-folks-navigating-bdsm-community-by-sinclair-sexsmith\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Zipper Magazine\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/Zipper-Magazine-113123824749292\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2022-06-13T12:42:28+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2023-02-23T09:26:18+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/zippermagazine.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/06\/tips-nonbinary-art.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1024\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"400\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:title\" content=\"9 Tips for Nonbinary Folks Navigating BDSM Community By Sinclair Sexsmith\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:description\" content=\"It can be challenging to find community as a kinky nonbinary person. So much of the BDSM subculture, from D\/s archetypes to representation, is rooted in \u201ctraditional\u201d gender roles. How do you find your people and place within kink? 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